I'm nearly ready for bed. I'm tired enough to fall fast asleep the minute my head hits the pillow. But a bunch of crummy thoughts are running through my head and I just can't force myself to lie in bed staring at the ceiling for a few hours.
Then I open blogger and see that it has been nine days since I last posted. I sink a little lower in my chair. Nine days? What has been going on for nine days that's kept me away from here?
Then I remember.
Intense fatigue. Loss of appetite. Dizziness. Odd bruises on my legs. A violent reaction to almost any kind of food I eat.
I figure I'm either pregnant or dying.
My doctor, once I finally get the courage to see him, tells me I'm neither one of those. He runs tests. He tells me that he's fairly sure I have a form of IBD called ulcerative colitis. IBD turns out to stand for inflammatory bowel disease. None of those three words are good. Put them together and they're just plain yucky. Definitely not something you talk about in public.
(Or on your blog.)
I look incredulously at my doctor and say, "But I'm only 30." Funny how 30 seemed so old when it greeted me in January. Now I'm using it as an excuse for why I shouldn't be sick.
"Most people have IBD onset in their late 20s or early 30s", he responds.
Then he outlines the plan. More tests at the gastroenterologist. Really fun tests like endoscopy and colonoscopy. Apparently 30 is the new 60.
And then once we get visual confirmation of the damage to my colon, (Ewww!) we'll try a combination of dietary and prescription measures to try to force my body into remission and keep it there for as long as possible. I need to make sure I get plenty of rest and take care of myself.
Also, stress is bad for me. I'm supposed to find a way to reduce that.
I couldn't help it. I burst out laughing.
He suggested yoga.
I asked if by yoga, he meant blogging.
I took his non-response as a yes.
p.s. Did you know that blogger's spellchecker suggests kaleidoscope as a substitute for colonoscopy? You learn new things all the time on this blog.
---Subscribe to World's Greatest Mommy posts by email or in a reader.
8 comments:
I have truly missed you and been wondering how you are. Sounds like you've been busy with lots of very not fun stuff. Add mommy to have 5 kiddos to your state of being and I can see where you don't exactly have time for blogging.
I will be praying for you, for strength, for remission, for peace that passes all understanding.
We're here anytime you need a yoga session.
Oh, so sorry about your health. It is so hard to feel bad and take care of little ones and keep up with everything else we need and want to do. I just said a prayer that you would find strength, peace and joy today.. and for wisdom for treatment.
Many blessings.
I love you! You make me giggle, even when you are talking about your struggles. I should be crying instead. But I am...I am crying inside after I giggle a little.
Need a yoga buddy?
I'm so glad you posted. I have been wondering how you were doing. I hope everything goes well for you. I will keep you on my prayer list. Take care of you!
You are so not alone. IBD is more commen than most people thing. I know three people that have it, and all are under the age of 30.
Blogging is so much better than Yoga...for sure!!
I've have been wondering how you were doing.
I have a friend who had colitis in her 30's. She manages it well & has energy again.
I hope the same happens for you. Keep us updated so we can pray.
I just stumbled into your blog and really shouldn't be giving advice, but you might want your Dr. to check your B12 levels, My daughter just had this done, it goes along with what you have and the symptoms. Anyway, maybe God just led me here to share that with you, who knows, Good Luck you sound like a lovely lady.
I certainly hope that you are feeling better. I do know how hard it is to take care of your family when you are feeling so crummy. I'll say some prayers that the fatigue and discomfort ease up!
Post a Comment